Black Is A Guy’s Best Friend

Men need to let women in on a certain color secret that all men understand and that no women get, and that’s that black is a guy’s best friend. This special guy color attracts men like a free buffet bar attracts a herd of Weight Watchers rejects for a few reasons. It certainly is a very popular color and many a guy has a lot of black things in his ‘wardrobe, ‘ if you want to call the pile of clothing he selects from a wardrobe, that is. Truly, Black never goes out of style. At least for guy.

But that’s probably not the biggest reason why men of any age love the color. No, it’s probably more true that they love it because it works exceedingly well at hiding a lot of dirt. Who wouldn’t love something black in color — at least if it’s a guy — that not only can make something look good but keep people from seeing how truly and hideously dirty it is. Even a simple black helmet for motorcycle riding never has to be cleaned when it’s in black.

And hiding dirt is probably something that is a high priority on most any man’s list of reasons for why he would get something that is predominantly were completely black in color. If the word ’style’ even enters into his vocabulary, it only does so grudgingly and because he’s probably trying to impress some woman who believes he’s actually really into arugula and European art films.

For most guys, even picking out something as simple as a watch will require thinking about how it can best appear to be clean when it’s not. This may be why they go for a black sport watch, after busily leafing through the discount store fliers for a good eight dollar model, it must be said. What guy, really, ever considers throwing down three grand on a Swiss watch that needs to be cleaned all the time and doesn’t come in black?

There’s really no secret to the color black, however, though whoever the guy was that created it should be celebrated forever and ever and toasted by men all over the world, who don’t have to worry about that pesky ketchup stain on their lap. With black, the problem of getting off that ketchup with a wet cloth never is really a problem. Now; talk to a man about having to do that in a pair of stylish khakis and there would be a different response.

So then; is there really anything to complain about when it comes to the color black? Other than that somebody who wears it from head to toe, day in and day out might be mistaken for some minion of the evil dark Lord Slaggathor or something, there really doesn’t seem to be much else that could be said in a negative manner about black, even when a men’s sport watch is covered in it. For a fact, though; women probably won’t be running around in black wedding dresses anytime soon, it seems.

Indeed, most men lovingly consider black to be the single greatest achievement created by men since the television remote control. This is especially so when the guy seizes up in fright at the thought of having to wash his favorite black jeans, even though they’ve only been worn for 25 or 26 times straight. Those jeans have helped to take 20 pounds off of his frame, which allows him to keep eating those deep-fried doughnuts and drinking those big court-sized sodas, and that’s a beautiful thing.